Oh yeah...

...and next Sunday, I am going to St. Louis for one night to see my Los Bike buddies...including Los Germany!! My neighbors are great, they will let Miner out and feed him Sunday night and Monday morning of Memorial Day weekend. I need to think of a good St. Louis-type thank you I can get them.

Getting Excited!!

Saturday, I drop Miner off at the doggie spa. Then it's the last class of this intersession. And THEN, on Sunday I get to go see Holly and Chris and Ruby!!! :) Seriously, I am so excited to see them.

freakin' mess

my head is a freakin' mess. I have to figure out how to leave work in time to let the dog out and still feel motivated once I am home to keep working or do homework. Tonight was just a waste. A complete waste. I have a sinus infection. I think the antibiotics are making me wacky. Either that or I just don't know how to be single and still take care of the dog and myself and the house. fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck.

Happy Happy, Shoes Shoes

Ignore the fact that my feet are in full on Hobbitt mode (well, 75% Hobbitt mode - they aren't hairy)...look how cute my new shoes are! :) My old pair of Chaco's lasted me 6 years...not too bad.

Good talk

I had a good talk today with that manager. Like I said, it boils down to what I ultimately want to do. I then took a friend out to lunch who is a career advisor. I love Teresa. She gave me some great insights and mentioned a strength finder assessment that I know we will do in Management in Organizations class later this summer. :)

So, I am in a do the job I have now well, and the next one will present itself when the opportunity is right. I think what it boils down to right now is that I don't want to leave the support network that I have in place here. At least not just yet. Who knew, I'd like the midwest?!

Part II

So, my approach for this conversation tomorrow is that this was one of the managers that was on my list to talk with as part of my "what does Amy want to be when she grows up" series of visits. And really, that's what I want to get a feel for. Would a job in that group (which would require relocation and travel) be something that would suit me. And what skills does he think help make someone in that position successful.

I worked on a pro-con list some last night. I also wrote down a few questions for myself in addition to the ones I want to ask this manager: Why am I feeling antsy right now? Why am I feeling like I should be looking for my next move? What's my motivation for looking into this job? All very good things to be asking myself.

On some level, I think I am feeling similar to what I felt 8 months after moving to the Quad Cities. I graduated college, went to work in OK, 8 months later got laid off. Moved back to Houston, started working for Hitachi, 8 months later I was getting relocated to here. So, 8 months after moving to the Quad Cities, I kept waiting for some big major change. Which never came and I was OK. But I remember feeling antsy and anxious and feeling like I should be preparing for big news or something. Well, I worked in the Hitachi division for 3 years. I worked at the Training Center for about 3 years. Here I am coming up on 3 years in my current job and I'm feeling antsy again.

Some days I say, "I don't want to do undercarriage the rest of my life." But really, if I did, I would be OK with that. I like it. There are enough variables that things are different every day and I am still challenged by this job I have right now. I make enough money to live very comfortably...so I start to wonder if it's ego. And I also wonder just what do I want to do in my career. I don't really have a 10 or 15 year plan. Hell, I barely have a 1 year plan. Do I want to be some big manager? Shit, I don't know. I am pretty damn happy where I am now. I work on different project teams, I get to do things that are interesting, I get to work with dealers and customers, and If I kept making what I make now, for the rest of my life, I'd be doing pretty damn well for myself.

When I started looking at that, and started writing down my pro's and con's, I really think I wound up figuring out that I am happy where I am. That I want to finish my MBA at Iowa. That I want to keep my dog and my little house. Ultimately, I think I don't need another big life changing thing to happen. Changing jobs and still being in the same place with my same support group would be one thing. But changing jobs and doing that in a place where I know no one would be more than I think I could handle right now.

So, I am still going to talk to this guy tomorrow, but it will be more of a conversation about deciding if a TSM job is the kind of field job that I would like, and would I be good at, or would I want a different kind of field job some day. And, he's a good guy to ask about other things I might not be thinking of where I can still work closely with dealers and customers...because that's what I really like about my jobs so far, working with dealers and customers. "I'm a people person, DAMNIT!!"

Dilema

Do I want a job where I travel 50% of the time? I loved it when I was single. I hated it when I was married. If I'm going to do it, now is the time in my career to do it. It would likely be a re-locate plus 50% travel. It would probably mean I would need to find a new home for Miner. Having field experience would open a lot more doors for me. And it would mean working more closely with our dealers - which I love. But I like my little house, and I love my dog. And, I don't even know if it's a job that I'd be considered for...it's just a maybe. Grrrr....I think I am a home-body, but if it weren't for the damn dog, I'd be all over it like white on rice. Shit.