You have to be fucking kidding me!

I took a healthy choice frozen thing to work yesterday for lunch. I wound up going out, but left it in the freezer at work to have today. It was the only one like it in there. Today, after strength training class, I was totally looking forward to my steamer chicken with balsamic something or other sauce and open the freezer and guess what. gone. G.O.N.E. Gone. 

I had a minor Ross Gellar episode a little mixed with when someone at KMNR ate Larry's subway sandwich. Still can't believe it. It's such bullshit that I should have to write my name on my food. How do you not remember if something was yours or not?

Good talk

I had a good talk today with that manager. Like I said, it boils down to what I ultimately want to do. I then took a friend out to lunch who is a career advisor. I love Teresa. She gave me some great insights and mentioned a strength finder assessment that I know we will do in Management in Organizations class later this summer. :)

So, I am in a do the job I have now well, and the next one will present itself when the opportunity is right. I think what it boils down to right now is that I don't want to leave the support network that I have in place here. At least not just yet. Who knew, I'd like the midwest?!

Part II

So, my approach for this conversation tomorrow is that this was one of the managers that was on my list to talk with as part of my "what does Amy want to be when she grows up" series of visits. And really, that's what I want to get a feel for. Would a job in that group (which would require relocation and travel) be something that would suit me. And what skills does he think help make someone in that position successful.

I worked on a pro-con list some last night. I also wrote down a few questions for myself in addition to the ones I want to ask this manager: Why am I feeling antsy right now? Why am I feeling like I should be looking for my next move? What's my motivation for looking into this job? All very good things to be asking myself.

On some level, I think I am feeling similar to what I felt 8 months after moving to the Quad Cities. I graduated college, went to work in OK, 8 months later got laid off. Moved back to Houston, started working for Hitachi, 8 months later I was getting relocated to here. So, 8 months after moving to the Quad Cities, I kept waiting for some big major change. Which never came and I was OK. But I remember feeling antsy and anxious and feeling like I should be preparing for big news or something. Well, I worked in the Hitachi division for 3 years. I worked at the Training Center for about 3 years. Here I am coming up on 3 years in my current job and I'm feeling antsy again.

Some days I say, "I don't want to do undercarriage the rest of my life." But really, if I did, I would be OK with that. I like it. There are enough variables that things are different every day and I am still challenged by this job I have right now. I make enough money to live very comfortably...so I start to wonder if it's ego. And I also wonder just what do I want to do in my career. I don't really have a 10 or 15 year plan. Hell, I barely have a 1 year plan. Do I want to be some big manager? Shit, I don't know. I am pretty damn happy where I am now. I work on different project teams, I get to do things that are interesting, I get to work with dealers and customers, and If I kept making what I make now, for the rest of my life, I'd be doing pretty damn well for myself.

When I started looking at that, and started writing down my pro's and con's, I really think I wound up figuring out that I am happy where I am. That I want to finish my MBA at Iowa. That I want to keep my dog and my little house. Ultimately, I think I don't need another big life changing thing to happen. Changing jobs and still being in the same place with my same support group would be one thing. But changing jobs and doing that in a place where I know no one would be more than I think I could handle right now.

So, I am still going to talk to this guy tomorrow, but it will be more of a conversation about deciding if a TSM job is the kind of field job that I would like, and would I be good at, or would I want a different kind of field job some day. And, he's a good guy to ask about other things I might not be thinking of where I can still work closely with dealers and customers...because that's what I really like about my jobs so far, working with dealers and customers. "I'm a people person, DAMNIT!!"

Dilema

Do I want a job where I travel 50% of the time? I loved it when I was single. I hated it when I was married. If I'm going to do it, now is the time in my career to do it. It would likely be a re-locate plus 50% travel. It would probably mean I would need to find a new home for Miner. Having field experience would open a lot more doors for me. And it would mean working more closely with our dealers - which I love. But I like my little house, and I love my dog. And, I don't even know if it's a job that I'd be considered for...it's just a maybe. Grrrr....I think I am a home-body, but if it weren't for the damn dog, I'd be all over it like white on rice. Shit.

Punching and Kicking

I love, love, LOVE when there is a Jazzercise routine with punching and I actually have a person's face to visualize. :) Let me be clear, the number of times I have hit a person and intended to inflict pain is like...twice...maybe. I think I attempted to slap one of the Brazell sisters at the bus stop in middle school, but didn't connect. And I don't really count any time I hit Erin or Brian because I think that evened out eventually (right e? right b?) Maybe that one time I threw a plastic cup at Erin and cut her cheek below her eye...but I digress.

Anyway, I have been getting way to emotionally involved in this project at work. By emotionally involved, I mean angry that I have provided answers to a group of people over the course of the last 8 months. The answer has not changed, they just don't like it. They continue to challenge it. I continue to provide evidence that supports what I am telling them. They still don't like it. They are in denial. It doesn't make their numbers in this project they are proposing look very good, so they are trying to get a different answer. So, they are planning to travel for a week on the west coast, visiting our dealers...who are more than likely going to give them the same answer I did. At least, I am pretty darn confident that our dealers will give them the same answers...otherwise I never would have given them that answer in the first place. So, when they get back and get the same answer I gave them, I can sit there smugly thinking, "See, I know what the fuck I am talking about!" while just saying, "that's good to have confirmation from more than one source that this is the strategy we need to follow."

I did get a little snippy on a conference call this afternoon. My boss said afterward, "Amy, try not to get so emotionally involved. You can hear it in your tone of voice. But, don't back down. You are right, and you need to continue to challenge them on this issue." I am thinking Jazzercise punching is going to be a darn good release for me today.

Between challenging the jerks at work and challenging my muscles with exercise, I kept telling myself all day, "Cha...cha...cha...challenge yourself!" Poussons & Johnsons know what I'm talking about. ;)

Something I Remembered Today

...was that if you want to convince someone to do something they don't want to, you
A. Make it seem like their idea
B. Comment how the fact that they are a "process pro" can help make things better
C. Don't "Pous Out" as JohnJohn would say - and share more information than is absolutely necessary.

Oh, I still realize that no one gives a shit about undercarriage and all the crazy requirements we have for warranty...but that's why I have a job. To make them care! Damnit!

Mental Health Day

...combined with a "my sinuses are a pain in my ass" day. In general, I just feel in a funk. And I only have one conference call on my calendar today, so I am working from home. I have a lot of email clean-up to do, so that will keep me busy. And not having the phone ringing will be nice, too. and if it gets a little warmer, Miner and I will go for a walk this afternoon before going to the vet. Heartworm check...and he's lost some weight, so I want to make sure I am feeding him enough given his increase in activity.

I should have the decree back from my lawyer today. That's most of the motivation to take a mental health day. This may evolve into a "shop online for music and a GPS system" day as well...or maybe an excursion to Best Buy for said GPS.

I think it was warmer in Davenport...

At least it was sunny yesterday out here (Phoenix). Monday was SUPER rainy. The demo site was a mess. Yesterday I nearly fell off a dozer trying to climb up to the cab to teach Marcy how to back it up. I got away with a big ugly bruise on the soft squishy part of my tricep.

Today marks the 1 month from having the decree filed. The paperwork and everything should be relatively painless. It's all the other stuff that's painful. I now have all the keys and garage door openers back. If the weather is nice this weekend, that's my project - changing locks and reprogramming garage door openers.

I'm off to get ready for work. All undercarriage, all the time. Though today, I am also being pulled into a meeting because they need someone who knows about the mining and quarrying business. See, I'll use my degree from time to time!

Marcy calls it "Puppy Prison"

Miner is headed to the kennel today. He has no idea. Eh, but he likes it there...It's like the doggy resort I am coming home from work early to run him out there. Then I pack, sleep and wake up at the butt-crack of dawn to head to sunny Phoenix, AZ. :) The high in Davenport today: 39-degrees. The high in Phoenix today: 76-degrees!!!!

too damn busy

It's still spring and I love it. It's cool enough in the morning and night for a jacket and has been nice and sunny. Last weekend we got the garden in. Already, some radishes are sprouting. I am hoping one of the three yellow pear tomatoes that I planted from seed will take.

Other than that, I have been SO busy at work and just exhausted, so that's why no posts for such a long time. We start prep for the deck and retaining wall this weekend, so there will be plenty of pictures to share.

office

After much discussion, we went to Ikea Friday night and got a bookshelf and desk. The coolest thing about this desk: the legs are adjustable. Which means, I can make it counter-top height! Should be nice for when my office works its part time job as a sewing room. I'll post some pictures later.

12 down, 88 to go.